Family Stories

An Open Letter To My Kids

So it’s Mother’s Day. It started at 7am with a tornado warning, me waking the kids, and bringing them downstairs. It passed. We all just hung out for awhile before the next tornado warning went off. This time the tornado was spotted on the ground, within miles of us, so we got into the tornado “safe” room. Thankfully that passed as well. Hours later we decided to take a walk. Dash is having a bad day. He’s Lyme raging. So we turned right back around and came home. Despite how weird the day has been, I’m just grateful that I’m able to mother these great kids. I know what a blessing that really is. So I’ve decided to write a note to each of my children because if not for them I wouldn’t be celebrating this day today.

1

Dash, you’re 6 1/2 – quickly outgrowing my lap, but never my heart. I remember finding out I was pregnant with you. You were a surprise baby. We thought we were done having babies until you came along and blessed us with your presence. The pregnancy was hard and little did I know you would be fighting along with me this wicked thing called Lyme disease. You’re a warrior child. You’ve never known a healthy day in your life but you live it to the fullest. I’m impressed with all you push your body to do. I love you more than you’ll probably ever know and will always be in your corner rooting you on, supporting you, and giving you loads of compassion and understanding as you find a way to live your best life even with late stage Lyme disease. I absolutely adore your kisses and hugs and sweet words to me. Your love of church and learning about God makes my heart skip beats. You’re such a sweet guy and I just adore you and your strength. Truly, your example of living your life with a chronic illness keeps me fighting to live mine as well as you do.

5

6

Oh Zane, you’re my silly – zaney 8 1/2 year old guy. Your name fits you so well. It’s unique and strong, like you. You’ve always been my light hearted kid. Always making jokes and laughing. You are also bull headed and a bit of a smart mouth but you know what? I think those qualities will serve you well as an adult, as long as you learn to use them well. You’re the leader, not the follower and you speak what’s on your mind. I love how you bless me out of the blue with thoughtful words and kind I love yous. You’re very observant, nothing gets past you. I love you more than you might ever know, but I sure do hope you know. We planned you. A brother for Nick. And though you two don’t always get a long, I know you love each other greatly – I’m so very very happy your daddy and I decided to have you. I pray for you and hope you grow into the man God has planned for you to become. Love you lots, buddy! You stretch me and teach me and mold me daily into a more patient and understanding mother. God knew what He was doing when He placed you in our family. Every family needs a Zane in it!

4

Hi Nick, my responsible, kind, growing-up-way-too-quickly-child who is now 11! I remember finding out we were pregnant with you. Your daddy was in the computer room, and I was in the master bathroom in our home on Flint Street. I kept staring at the pregnancy test in disbelief. You were not planned but you were the best surprise anyone could ever have! What can I say about you? It’s hard to put into words how you feel about your first born. I love you all the same but there’s something special about the experience with a first born. I learned to be a mother because of you and with you. You taught me how to love unconditionally and be selfless and laugh at myself. You taught me to be a bull dog when I know something is wrong with my child and never back down with my beliefs in how you all should be raised. You also shaped who I am today and how I look at my own parents. I appreciate the big man you’re growing into and how much you help me around the house and with the other kids. You impress me daily with your consideration. And though we’re approaching the teen years, I am hopeful we will continue developing our close relationship with one another – that I pray will last a life time. I love you sweet Nicky. Always and forever. You may barely fit in my lap but will always have a special spot in my heart.